Today I am presenting a guest post and testimonial from Kendra Gettel. Reading her article really brought tears to my eyes, I was so touched by it. I really hope that lots of people, and especially lots of parents, read this article. Because one of the main reasons why I write this blog is to spread the message about the effect of food on our body, mind and soul, in other words our whole being.

A difficult start

Life with our daughter was anything but easy for the first 3 ½ years. Shortly after she was born, she started crying once a day for about an hour - for no apparent reason. Our paediatrician and others assured us that this was completely normal and that we were far from having a 'screaming child' - which didn't change the fact that we were completely stressed by it.

At around 4 months of age, sleep problems were added to the mix. Our little one simply had trouble falling asleep. She didn't sleep when you put her down, but had to be carried or breastfed for a long time. And once she was asleep, she would wake up screaming again shortly afterwards. Our daily evening routine consisted of putting her to bed and then soothing our waking and crying child every twenty minutes or so. She also woke up frequently at night, cried and only calmed down again by breastfeeding.

My husband at the time suspected early on that there was a digestive problem with babies, but this was considered unlikely by the doctors and was not pursued further.

No help in sight

Perhaps I don't need to mention that it was an extremely stressful and nerve-wracking time. We sought help from various sources, but the message was almost always the same: it was up to us. Because we, or rather I, were breastfeeding the little one to sleep, because we weren't providing her with enough structure and regularity etc. etc.

I found this strange, because other mothers I knew were also breastfeeding their children to sleep, and these children were still sleeping peacefully for most of the night. With hindsight, I say: That's such stupid information!

The same with "regularity and structure". Our daughter woke up screaming up to ten times (!!!) a night. In the early morning, we usually fell back into a longer sleep of 1 ½ - 2 hours. I took every minute of sleep I could get, no matter when. It was simply a matter of survival.

The insistence on keeping to certain "times", which my daughter didn't keep anyway despite all her efforts, could probably only come from people who had never experienced anything like it. I tried for a few weeks, which amounted to me spending half the day trying to somehow get her to sleep at certain times. To no avail. It just didn't work.

A supposedly normal toddler

We put it down to teething for a few months, but in the end all the teeth were there and our child continued to sleep badly.

Another characteristic of hers was that she was extremely active and hardly ever sat still - except for not too long stretches in the baby carriage. She was constantly on the move, and at the same time often overtired and then whiny. Of course - she probably slept far too little!

Well, we told ourselves that our child was just like that. She would probably become a sportswoman or circus acrobat one day. And some People just don't need much sleep - maybe she was one of them?

The situation improved when my husband and I separated. Our daughter alternated between spending a few nights a week with me and the weekend with him. This meant that we could each sleep in from time to time - and sleep in!

She was still extremely active during the day. And she had tantrums and screaming fits several times a day, usually when she didn't get something she wanted. I also experienced some classic scenes in a mother's life, like the child who throws herself on the floor at the supermarket checkout screaming because she wants something and her mother says "No!". When we came home from shopping and I didn't want to carry her up the stairs (because I had 5 heavy shopping bags with me as well as her), she would scream. If I wanted to go left and she wanted to go right, we had a scene.

Even then we thought it was normal, the "defiant phase". You just have to go through it, don't you? At the same time, we were also proud of our "strong-willed" child. She was probably just a born leader?

So we were two pretty exhausted parents with a supposedly totally normal toddler. Until I made a discovery.

Dietary changes for children who don't sleep well - my discovery

Just before Christmas 2014, I came across "Failsafe" by chance. Failsafe is a nutritional program from Australia that is virtually unknown in this country, and I became aware of it because I read a reference somewhere to "children who sleep badly".

To my astonishment, I learned that children who sleep badly at night and wake up screaming all the time very often suffer from what is known as salicylate intolerance. Salicylates? Never heard of them!

I read on: salicylates are found in almost all types of fruit and vegetables, olive oil, nuts, tea and coffee. We consumed plenty of them (apart from coffee) as we were keen to eat healthily.

Then there were other substances that often caused health problems, behavioral disorders and unusual sleeping patterns: Preservatives and additives, colorings, glutamates and amines. Failsafe suggests a three-week elimination diet, during which all these substances are eliminated and it is checked whether anything changes in the child.

After the dietary change, the unbelievable

happened
Within a few days, I disposed of most of our food stocks, bought what was allowed according to Failsafe and put our daughter on a diet.

It took exactly 2 ½ days for the unbelievable to happen:

Our little girl (then 3 years and 4 months) was suddenly completely calm. She stopped scurrying around all the time. She wanted to look at books and color much more often. She fell asleep more quickly in the evening. And the tantrums and screaming fits stopped!

An easier life begins

Life with her became much easier. After shopping, she climbed the stairs herself. Her speech development took a leap. Her wetting suddenly stopped. When I said "no" to something, there was usually no protest. No stress. Nothing!

Her sleep patterns were still not optimal - she still woke up and cried a lot during the night. But during the day she was simply a different child.

The test phase with shocking results

After approx. Two months later, we did the tests suggested by Failsafe to find out exactly what our child was reacting to. First we tried amines (including chocolate, bananas and fish). The result was shocking: she became increasingly whiny and clingy and had more and more crying fits.

After three or four days, she threw herself on the floor several times a day for trivial reasons and cried and screamed - for up to an hour. When we wanted to know what was going on, she couldn't tell us. After a while, she usually wanted to "watch a movie" and there was a further escalation when we refused. When her friend came to visit, she didn't play with her but took away all her toys and hit her.

After about 10 days, we had enough of this experiment and reintroduced strict failsafe. 2 days later, everything was back to normal!

The restlessness comes back

Then the salicylate test: We finally gave our little one her much-loved apples again, along with various other vegetables, olive oil and spices. This time, too, she became increasingly whiny and frustration-intolerant. And again she was normal 2 days after Failsafe was reintroduced.

So we stuck strictly to the diet again, but towards the end of the spring I became thoughtful. More and more often it seemed as if the old restlessness was coming back, even though we were sticking strictly to the rules. I also found it increasingly annoying to be so restricted in our food choices.

A new hope: GAPS

I found out about "GAPS", the book by doctor Natasha Campbell-McBride, via a Facebook group of affected parents. You can find the GAPS book* here. She describes food intolerances as a consequence of a disturbed and permeable intestinal flora that does not break down certain substances properly. These improperly digested substances can then cause both behavioral abnormalities and health problems in the body.

As Campbell-McBride, whose own son, who was diagnosed with autism, became completely healthy again through a change in diet and intestinal cleansing, explains further, the main problem lies in the absorption of certain sugars and types of starch. If the intestinal flora is disturbed, these are no longer digested by the intestine, but only serve as a nutrient medium for pathogenic intestinal germs, fungi and parasites. This problem worsens over time as long as these types of sugar and starch continue to be present in the diet and there are not enough "good" intestinal bacteria to keep the "bad" ones in check.

And, the author continues, this is also the key to why many people develop more and more food intolerances over time, as the imbalance in the gut continues to increase if you don't actively do something about it.

I immediately thought of our daughter, who, despite Failsafe, was showing the same restlessness symptoms as before. The whole thing made total sense to me, and once again I changed our diet within days.

A complete change of diet for my child

Our motto now is: no sugar and no starch, but lots of healthy fats, vegetables, probiotic foods and probiotics. Instead of oatmeal with rice milk (as in the Failsafe days), we have scrambled eggs with vegetables for breakfast.

Instead of potatoes, pasta and rice, we have lentils. Black, brown, red, yellow... We can do without bread, just in case, I have a starch- and sugar-free version from Cashew nuts, eggs and butter in the freezer.

In our case, the changeover went relatively smoothly. For the first few days, our little one still wanted her beloved oatmeal, but she soon accepted the alternative and lentils are now one of her favorite foods.

What we have experienced since then always brings tears of joy and gratitude to my eyes.

A speechless, proud and happy mother

Just a few days after the changeover, we noticed that she was able to eat small amounts of previously intolerable fruit and vegetables again without any reaction.

A few strawberries or half an apple are no longer a problem - although we severely limit fruit because it contains sugar. She can also eat cucumbers and carrots again. Peppers. Even olive oil and fish are no longer a problem. Isn't that brilliant?

She is now usually in a good mood, balanced and cooperative. She is putting on weight and has a huge appetite. She loves salad. And the best thing is that when other people offer her something sweet or otherwise "forbidden", she refuses!

Her father just told me that she decided to have roast beef instead of strawberry cake in a restaurant with him during the vacations. And when I was out for dinner with her and my family the other day, she said: "Mom, I want salad and tomato and cucumber!" (We were able to replace the spaghetti she also wanted with turkey steak by mutual agreement). At my brother's wedding buffet, she picked out tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers and guacamole - without any help from me - AND LEFT BAGUETTE, POTATOES AND PASTA OUT!

I'm speechless. And proud. And happy. My impression is that her body is once again instinctively sensing what is good for it and what is not. It's as if a spell has been broken - the "sugar spell".

Everyday life after the change in diet

Admittedly, I spend a lot of time in the kitchen and spend more money on our diet than I used to. I still buy almost exclusively organic produce and prepare everything fresh.

For children's birthday parties, I have successfully created muffins made from cashew, coconut, eggs, butter, vanilla and a little banana, with strawberries pureed in butter as icing. Our little one is then proud of the "pink cake" that her mommy baked especially for her (or the two of us together) and has no problem giving up the other things. But what do you mean by giving up: this recipe is so damn delicious that I feel sorry for the others!

Sleeping could still be better, but overall it's going in a good direction.

And one more thing: since the introduction of GAPS, which I of course also do (a, because I think it's unfair to my daughter if she has to watch us eat pasta and b, because I'm sure it doesn't harm me either!), my skin has rejuvenated by an estimated five years in just a few weeks. My skin health has improved and I feel better too. I am thrilled!

A wish for other parents

I wish that many more parents would find this information and have a better life with their children as a result. I no longer believe that catastrophic sleeping behavior and constant tantrums and crying fits are "normal".

Of course my child is angry or cries about something sometimes, but The frequency, intensity and duration of such incidents have decreased significantly. When a friend recently told me about similar episodes with her child and asked me what I do in such situations, I was amused to discover that I virtually no longer have this problem. Hooray!

And I can tell you exactly when: since the day we banned sugar and starch from our diet!
Kendra Gettel

About the author

Gettel is the mother of a four-year-old daughter and lives and works with her partner near Basel. Professionally, she supports women in having happy and fulfilling relationships with their husbands.

On her blog at www.kendragettel.de, Kendra Gettel shares lots of practical tips on how to resolve conflicts and deal with feelings and gives honest accounts of her own experiences.

You are very welcome to drop by!

Kendraand I would be delighted to receive your comments, questions and testimonials. Can you imagine that a change in diet can have such far-reaching consequences? How do you think Kendra's daughter would have developed if she hadn't changed her diet? What changes will you make to your diet after reading this?