[g_podcast id="10767257"]
Eva Lueg is avocation & relationship coach. She mainly helps women in unhappy relationships to find their own new path in life andsupports them either in finding a fulfilling relationship or in the process of breaking up.Eva's greatest concern is to strengthen women's self-esteem and encourage them not to let themselves be beaten down so easily and to trust their own opinions, to become emotionally independent of their husbands and, if possible, economically independent.Shealsorarelyaccompaniesmen in their separation process.
In this interview, I talk to Eva abouthow you can prevent your partner from sabotaging you when you want to make a change in your life, suchas changing your diet.
The topics are:
I'm delighted to have Eva Lueg as my guest today. Welcome, Eva!
Eva: Thank you very much. I'm delighted to be here and to have a nice chat with you.
Thank you for taking the time. You are a vocation and relationship coach. It would be exciting to talk a little about the topic of relationships. Especially for people who are in a process of change.
A change in diet or a bowel cleanse can be quite a big change and a big challenge for some people. You want support from your partner so that no obstacles are put in your way. Sometimes I hear from my clients that their partners are not supportive and even talk badly about it.
What do you think would be a good way to respond to something like this when you get a headwind?
Eva: We've already said that this is exactly the topic that overlaps in our consultations with you and me. Most of the time, one person comes to me and then goes into the change process and then the partner is irritated. I experience this every day in my everyday practice. My experience is that very often it is simply not communicated well from the start. It's not a bad intention at all, it's often the case that the person going through the change process doesn't really know themselves yet. is clear about what is happening to him.
Here I would recommend getting his partner on board and saying 'Look, I've been suffering from this situation for a very long time and I would very much like to change something about it. It's possible that I won't react in the same way in the future. Something will certainly change and I would really like you to support me in this.'
Perhaps also announce that this will be a process that is not so controllable at first. Where things happen that you can't foresee. That you need support from someone close to you at times like this.
Partners are often afraid that they will have to eat with you or that it won't taste good. You could also say 'I'm doing this for myself. If you don't want to join in, you don't have to.
I think for many people it would be a help if their partner cooked something for themselves during this time. Especially when women have always been responsible for this and suddenly they have to do everything twice and it's already difficult for one person anyway.
What do you think? Do you have any ideas?
Eva: I definitely think it's a good suggestion, as you say. The best thing is always to ask a question. 'Can you imagine taking care of yourself during this time?' 'Do you have any ideas about what you could learn from taking care of yourself?' 'How can we make sure that we are responsible for our own nutrition during the 6 weeks?'
That's my favourite topic, that people become freer within relationships. It's a big step towards personal responsibility to say 'Ok, then I'll cook for myself during that time.'
And I think if a partner is simply asked and doesn't feel that decisions are being made over their head, there's a good chance they'll actually go along with it.
Could it be that women have a tendency to want to help change their partner? Like forcing them into something they don't want?
Eva: Yes. Women often want to change men. I had a man in coaching again today after a long time. It was so clear again! As a women's coach, I simply had to give the tip myself and say 'We really often want to change you men'.
That's something we can definitely learn at this point. That the partner can continue to eat his unhealthy food under certain circumstances, but please don't persuade his partner to eat it too. Your topic also offers a lot of opportunity to develop a new tolerance and appreciation for each other.
What do you think is behind it when someone actually wants to sabotage my customers' efforts? I once had a customer who was struggling to give up sweets and sugar and then the man demonstratively sat down next to her and ate his ice cream. What could be behind someone doing that?
Eva: It could be various things. What you're saying sounds very mean. If we assume that partners initially react unconsciously and don't deliberately want something from their partner, we can always assume fear of loss. Of course, it's not so conscious, but very often when partners see 'Oh, my wife is starting to change! We've gotten to know each other's habits and have categorized this as a character trait.
We think our partner is the way they are - with all their (also damaging) habits. And when If he now gives up a harmful habit, a part of another part of his personality is revealed underneath, which the partner did not choose. Where he then thinks 'Oh. My wife is no longer such a pleasure-seeker'. So to speak: 'Now my partner is no longer the way I got to know and love him. Then there's the question of "Do I want him like this?"
Not wanting to be confronted with all these questions at first could lead to this kind of behavior. If we go to the extreme and I hear you saying that you're being extra mean, I would actually assume that it's intentional and I find that very questionable. I would almost assume a pathological disorder.
I think our tolerance level is often relatively high, that we let a lot happen to us, especially when we've been together for a long time. Do you also notice that many people stay in a relationship for a very long time because they are more afraid of getting out, even though they are not happy?
Eva: Yes. Definitely. I know that from a lot of clients that I'm allowed to accompany. And I have to admit: from my own life too. Staying in something for a long time that I haven't wanted to stay in for a long time. The fear, or the fear of loss, is often not so clear at first. I think people are very good at convincing themselves that what they're in is right.
They think it's their great love, or their great passion or calling. The awareness is often simply not there. We're incredibly good at making excuses or convincing ourselves why it's right.
I don't think we're brave enough to be honest with ourselves or to listen to our intuition or our intuition - because we've actually known for a long time that what's going on isn't right. And to come back to the beginning - getting people on board, or describing unspecific situations in communication, even if you don't have them clearly yet; bringing something like that up and saying 'I don't like the way things are going' 'I'm not happy right now, there's something that keeps bothering me. I would like to change that. - is often a good way to get things moving.
Having the courage to admit to yourself that something is wrong is really important! I think we train our partners how to deal with us because we allow it. When we then start to change, we may suddenly realize that it doesn't suit us. We have trained our partner for years to be allowed to treat us like this. I think that's a difficult point, to first find the clarity within yourself that it can't go on like this.
Eva: Yes, exactly. But 'we let them deal with us' is actually more of a woman's thing. I think it's great that you said: 'It takes time to admit to yourself that it's no longer right for you'. And then the next step is to tell your partner.
And to take it one step further: if you then change and express this, you also have to withstand the headwind. Knowing that your partner may not agree with this and will try to sabotage it. And not to give up immediately, but to really stick with it and keep repeating 'Look, the new thing is right for me. I know you don't quite agree with it yet. And then stick with it! Having confidence, especially for women and keeping the leg stiff takes a few repetitions until the partner has got the hang of it. In many cases, he gets it eventually.
That's exactly what I've experienced with one couple. The fact that they did this course together had a positive impact on their relationship. It's so important to keep at it and not give up and not throw the relationship to the wind right away!
That's a certain tendency I sometimes see, that people are very quick to doubt their partner. There are both - those who hold on to a relationship for far too long and those who give up far too quickly. I believe that if I want to change someone, it's all about me changing and the other person automatically changes with me - or they leave. If you're prepared to take that risk, the likelihood of things falling apart is much smaller.
Eva: Exactly. I have a completely different option! I sometimes come up with innovative approaches. If you have to break up, then it can happen gently. You can also go your separate ways for a while, or even physically. I think this is legitimate for long-term relationships and an opportunity to feel who you really are! And then to decide again 'How do I want to meet my partner again? Is it still a good fit? This can also lead to a very fruitful reunion, or to a separation that doesn't have to be so radical. I would like to see more openness for such transitional solutions, because so many people still think in black and white.
Does it actually happen that people who break up get back together?
Eva: I haven't seen that many study results yet. I haven't experienced that yet. I've been trying to spread the word recently and not that many people have taken advantage of such transitional solutions yet. Rather shorter things, such as going away together for more weekends than just once a year and planning not to expect so much from each other on that weekend. Or to go your separate ways on that weekend and not always hang out together. This has often led to very good results.
I read that Robert Betz said: 'You should actually be alone for one hour a day, one day a week and one week a year. I really liked that, it really spoke to me. He's kind of right.
Eva: Yes. Because putting up with yourself makes you even more relationship-worthy!
To put it in a nutshell: when we decide to do more for our health or change our lifestyle, it's important to first come to yourself and ask yourself "What do I want?" and then communicate this to your partner, family and friends.
I always have the feeling that your circle of friends also has an influence. You can tell where there is pressure from society. I always say: 'Don't defend yourself and don't explain yourself'.
Do you have any ideas? Ultimately, it's about simply communicating what you do and what's important to you. And then the third point is to stick with it and be firm and say 'I'm taking care of ME now! The people who are close to me will see that I'm doing well with it. I would make the same recommendation as I did earlier with my partner.
Eva: I'd recommend it. Knowing that there is very likely to be a headwind. I'm a big fan of always including the emotional world - and then allowing this strange feeling for a moment that someone opposite you doesn't agree.
Just take a deep breath - you know it's coming - and simply say nothing and accept that someone is trying to rebel against something new. You can respond with a short statement like 'I'm currently changing my diet and I'd like to stay true to myself. That's why I don't eat pizza. I know you know me differently, but now it's time for something new'.
That your counterpart feels seen and that's all I would say.
I once had a customer who lost a lot of weight and fell back into the old pattern because he was the only one in his family, friends and work circle who ate healthily. This caused him so much trouble that he eventually gave in.
I think there are many people in this situation who would like their environment to support them. It's important that the momentum and motivation is so high that you follow through and remain patient and don't think 'Oh, poor me, I have to eat vegetables while everyone is eating pizza'. But rather 'I can do something good for myself. What the others do is none of my business'.
Eva: Yes, that's true. But I think it's a big challenge to go your own way in such a very different environment. I think that's very challenging.
I advised him at the time (unfortunately I didn't have the online course yet) that he should get to know at least one new person in his environment who also ticks in this direction. You should perhaps spend time in places where there is a good chance that there will be other people there who are interested in the topic.
Eva: That's why I think it's so good that you combine this with the lifestyle. In this example in particular, it's very clear that, in addition to diet, a change in lifestyle would also have been very beneficial.
Of course, you can't do anything about work colleagues and you have friends. But I think you can be open to meeting 2-3 new friends, or taking a course or going to a seminar.
Eva: Now I'm coming back to the table with my direct messages. I've found that it raises new questions about the relationships you have. I would actually question them for a while if I changed my lifestyle and my diet. If I go into health and awareness, it might be painful, but sometimes some friendships and acquaintances no longer fit.
That's true and I think that's another good point about being really vigilant and honest with yourself.
Eva: I think changing your diet or having made the decision to really do something in this direction is a big step towards being honest with yourself.
And towards self-love. I always say 'The gut is symbolic of our center and our roots and how we stand with our feet on the ground'. Basic trust has something to do with the gut and that's why it actually has very big connections.
I think you've given some great tips! I think what I'll definitely take away from our conversation is that the The importance of looking at things that may come up - and especially when you change your diet, detox, get rid of things, true essences sometimes emerge.
And that you are vigilant, mindful and face these processes and have the courage to say 'Oh, things are coming up that I didn't really want to look at, but if they're already there, I'll look at them too!
Eva: And while you're on the subject of toxins and detoxification. There are also toxic relationships. It doesn't always have to be an entire relationship, but there are toxic behaviors in relationships. You can change them, but they also come up. Like you described earlier with the man who sits next to you with an ice cream. There's something toxic in there and that also comes to the table. But you can also look at this and change it in the same way as your diet.
And I've always said: 'Nutrition coaching is actually life coaching'. It may start with nutrition, but for me it's actually a gateway to a new life.
Dear Eva, I could go on forever, but I would love to hear something else from you.
If anyone would like more honesty and more knowledge about their relationships - do you have an offer? Would you like to say something about that?
Eva: I am one of a few 1:1 coaches. I don't have an online program, I don't do group programs. I've stayed true to 1:1 coaching and I'm still very passionate about it. I help people create new relationships and new careers and my focus is on leaving the 'old' behind.
There always needs to be a regenerative space. People come out of something that was very stressful, have stayed in something for a very long time that they no longer want to stay in.
Most people who come to me are like that and I simply want to focus on these regenerative processes.
That has a lot to do with connecting and dealing with your emotional world and then moving into the new in a stronger way. I do this much more slowly and with a lot of space and attention. My coaching sessions are always 2 or 3-month programs that start with a personal retreat day with me - that will soon be in the Allgäu, I'm moving there now.
These programs always start with this personal day. If that's not suitable, you can also do it online. Then there is a 2-month follow-up program, which can also be done online. I take a lot of space and time for my clients so that they can digest these processes, regenerate and then move step by step into the new.
This is what I offer in terms of relationships and career. I do initial consultations and then I very often focus on what my client needs. I put together individual programs. If you would like to try out my work - I have my free half-hour online self-love sessions this week and next week, where there are still a few calls available. Anyone who would like to try it out can send me a PN via Facebook, or an email at: info@evalueg.de
May they refer to having listened to the podcast and would love to would like to try out?
Eva: Yes, exactly.
This retreat day, are you alone with yourself? Or how should we imagine it?
Eva: You're alone with me and there are lots of tasks, but also lots of space and time to process them. I come from a bodywork background, so I have the opportunity to use bodywork and a day like this ends (for those who want to) with bodywork that digests everything.
This digestion - while we're on the subject of the gut - is very important to me because I think it's important to implement mindset processes in the body and let them sink in. Not always just tasks and learning and implementing, but also integrating the passive part.
And our body reflects and signals a lot to us.
Eva: Exactly and also brings us a new clarity! I'm sure you know that too. When the gut becomes healthier, it brings new clarity to the surface.
Totally! Customers have already told me that it has changed their lives. It's amazing what a small and simple change in diet can do to get things flowing where someone may have suffered for years.
My passion is to empower people to take control of their lives and make their dreams come true.
I think it's great that everyone in this field complements each other so well and that issues can be approached from different angles, but always have the same end goal in the end. It's nice to see that one thing can lead to another.
That a change in diet can lead to whether I'm still happy in my partnership or things like that.
Eva: Exactly, or a break-up from a partnership can lead to: 'Oh, how unhealthy have I actually been living? As a new start, so to speak.
Is there anything else you would like to say to my listeners at the end?
Eva: I would pick out one aspect that I have said before.
First of all, it is often enough to have a bad feeling to say 'I don't want that'. We don't always have to explain everything.
It's enough to have a bad feeling and to express it and, in the process, to calmly express immature states. 'I don't know why yet, but it doesn't feel right.' 'I'm not happy with it, I'd like it to be different.'
Saying it like this helps enormously, also for your partner.
Having more courage to allow, express and communicate these immature states much more imperfectly.
Thank you very much!
These are the links to the episode:
Eva offers free self-love online sessions (30 minutes)for Darmglückpodcast listeners, you can contact her via Facebook or email if you would like to take advantage of this.
Eva Lueg's website is: https://evalueg.de/
Now I encourage you to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode, and if you like what you hear, I really appreciate a review on iTunes or Apple Podcast. Because those reviews also help other people find the podcast so we can spread the knowledge about gut and health more.
Eva Lueg is avocation & relationship coach. She mainly helps women in unhappy relationships to find their own new path in life andsupports them either in finding a fulfilling relationship or in the process of breaking up.Eva's greatest concern is to strengthen women's self-esteem and encourage them not to let themselves be beaten down so easily and to trust their own opinions, to become emotionally independent of their husbands and, if possible, economically independent.Shealsorarelyaccompaniesmen in their separation process.
In this interview, I talk to Eva abouthow you can prevent your partner from sabotaging you when you want to make a change in your life, suchas changing your diet.
The topics are:
- Fear of loss
- honesty
- communication
- and how to express yourself to get your partner on board
If your partner doesn't want to support your dietary changes...
I'm delighted to have Eva Lueg as my guest today. Welcome, Eva!
Eva: Thank you very much. I'm delighted to be here and to have a nice chat with you.
Thank you for taking the time. You are a vocation and relationship coach. It would be exciting to talk a little about the topic of relationships. Especially for people who are in a process of change.
A change in diet or a bowel cleanse can be quite a big change and a big challenge for some people. You want support from your partner so that no obstacles are put in your way. Sometimes I hear from my clients that their partners are not supportive and even talk badly about it.
Good communication is the be-all and end-all
What do you think would be a good way to respond to something like this when you get a headwind?
Eva: We've already said that this is exactly the topic that overlaps in our consultations with you and me. Most of the time, one person comes to me and then goes into the change process and then the partner is irritated. I experience this every day in my everyday practice. My experience is that very often it is simply not communicated well from the start. It's not a bad intention at all, it's often the case that the person going through the change process doesn't really know themselves yet. is clear about what is happening to him.
Here I would recommend getting his partner on board and saying 'Look, I've been suffering from this situation for a very long time and I would very much like to change something about it. It's possible that I won't react in the same way in the future. Something will certainly change and I would really like you to support me in this.'
Perhaps also announce that this will be a process that is not so controllable at first. Where things happen that you can't foresee. That you need support from someone close to you at times like this.
Take personal responsibility and show tolerance towards your partner
Partners are often afraid that they will have to eat with you or that it won't taste good. You could also say 'I'm doing this for myself. If you don't want to join in, you don't have to.
I think for many people it would be a help if their partner cooked something for themselves during this time. Especially when women have always been responsible for this and suddenly they have to do everything twice and it's already difficult for one person anyway.
What do you think? Do you have any ideas?
Eva: I definitely think it's a good suggestion, as you say. The best thing is always to ask a question. 'Can you imagine taking care of yourself during this time?' 'Do you have any ideas about what you could learn from taking care of yourself?' 'How can we make sure that we are responsible for our own nutrition during the 6 weeks?'
That's my favourite topic, that people become freer within relationships. It's a big step towards personal responsibility to say 'Ok, then I'll cook for myself during that time.'
And I think if a partner is simply asked and doesn't feel that decisions are being made over their head, there's a good chance they'll actually go along with it.
Could it be that women have a tendency to want to help change their partner? Like forcing them into something they don't want?
Eva: Yes. Women often want to change men. I had a man in coaching again today after a long time. It was so clear again! As a women's coach, I simply had to give the tip myself and say 'We really often want to change you men'.
That's something we can definitely learn at this point. That the partner can continue to eat his unhealthy food under certain circumstances, but please don't persuade his partner to eat it too. Your topic also offers a lot of opportunity to develop a new tolerance and appreciation for each other.
What do you think is behind it when someone actually wants to sabotage my customers' efforts? I once had a customer who was struggling to give up sweets and sugar and then the man demonstratively sat down next to her and ate his ice cream. What could be behind someone doing that?
Eva: It could be various things. What you're saying sounds very mean. If we assume that partners initially react unconsciously and don't deliberately want something from their partner, we can always assume fear of loss. Of course, it's not so conscious, but very often when partners see 'Oh, my wife is starting to change! We've gotten to know each other's habits and have categorized this as a character trait.
We think our partner is the way they are - with all their (also damaging) habits. And when If he now gives up a harmful habit, a part of another part of his personality is revealed underneath, which the partner did not choose. Where he then thinks 'Oh. My wife is no longer such a pleasure-seeker'. So to speak: 'Now my partner is no longer the way I got to know and love him. Then there's the question of "Do I want him like this?"
Not wanting to be confronted with all these questions at first could lead to this kind of behavior. If we go to the extreme and I hear you saying that you're being extra mean, I would actually assume that it's intentional and I find that very questionable. I would almost assume a pathological disorder.
Dealing with fear of loss and headwinds
I think our tolerance level is often relatively high, that we let a lot happen to us, especially when we've been together for a long time. Do you also notice that many people stay in a relationship for a very long time because they are more afraid of getting out, even though they are not happy?
Eva: Yes. Definitely. I know that from a lot of clients that I'm allowed to accompany. And I have to admit: from my own life too. Staying in something for a long time that I haven't wanted to stay in for a long time. The fear, or the fear of loss, is often not so clear at first. I think people are very good at convincing themselves that what they're in is right.
They think it's their great love, or their great passion or calling. The awareness is often simply not there. We're incredibly good at making excuses or convincing ourselves why it's right.
I don't think we're brave enough to be honest with ourselves or to listen to our intuition or our intuition - because we've actually known for a long time that what's going on isn't right. And to come back to the beginning - getting people on board, or describing unspecific situations in communication, even if you don't have them clearly yet; bringing something like that up and saying 'I don't like the way things are going' 'I'm not happy right now, there's something that keeps bothering me. I would like to change that. - is often a good way to get things moving.
Find your own clarity
Having the courage to admit to yourself that something is wrong is really important! I think we train our partners how to deal with us because we allow it. When we then start to change, we may suddenly realize that it doesn't suit us. We have trained our partner for years to be allowed to treat us like this. I think that's a difficult point, to first find the clarity within yourself that it can't go on like this.
Eva: Yes, exactly. But 'we let them deal with us' is actually more of a woman's thing. I think it's great that you said: 'It takes time to admit to yourself that it's no longer right for you'. And then the next step is to tell your partner.
And to take it one step further: if you then change and express this, you also have to withstand the headwind. Knowing that your partner may not agree with this and will try to sabotage it. And not to give up immediately, but to really stick with it and keep repeating 'Look, the new thing is right for me. I know you don't quite agree with it yet. And then stick with it! Having confidence, especially for women and keeping the leg stiff takes a few repetitions until the partner has got the hang of it. In many cases, he gets it eventually.
"If I want to change someone, it's all about me wanting to change
"That's exactly what I've experienced with one couple. The fact that they did this course together had a positive impact on their relationship. It's so important to keep at it and not give up and not throw the relationship to the wind right away!
That's a certain tendency I sometimes see, that people are very quick to doubt their partner. There are both - those who hold on to a relationship for far too long and those who give up far too quickly. I believe that if I want to change someone, it's all about me changing and the other person automatically changes with me - or they leave. If you're prepared to take that risk, the likelihood of things falling apart is much smaller.
Eva: Exactly. I have a completely different option! I sometimes come up with innovative approaches. If you have to break up, then it can happen gently. You can also go your separate ways for a while, or even physically. I think this is legitimate for long-term relationships and an opportunity to feel who you really are! And then to decide again 'How do I want to meet my partner again? Is it still a good fit? This can also lead to a very fruitful reunion, or to a separation that doesn't have to be so radical. I would like to see more openness for such transitional solutions, because so many people still think in black and white.
What brings a partnership back together?
Does it actually happen that people who break up get back together?
Eva: I haven't seen that many study results yet. I haven't experienced that yet. I've been trying to spread the word recently and not that many people have taken advantage of such transitional solutions yet. Rather shorter things, such as going away together for more weekends than just once a year and planning not to expect so much from each other on that weekend. Or to go your separate ways on that weekend and not always hang out together. This has often led to very good results.
I read that Robert Betz said: 'You should actually be alone for one hour a day, one day a week and one week a year. I really liked that, it really spoke to me. He's kind of right.
Eva: Yes. Because putting up with yourself makes you even more relationship-worthy!
Communicate your desire to change your diet and stand firm!
To put it in a nutshell: when we decide to do more for our health or change our lifestyle, it's important to first come to yourself and ask yourself "What do I want?" and then communicate this to your partner, family and friends.
I always have the feeling that your circle of friends also has an influence. You can tell where there is pressure from society. I always say: 'Don't defend yourself and don't explain yourself'.
Do you have any ideas? Ultimately, it's about simply communicating what you do and what's important to you. And then the third point is to stick with it and be firm and say 'I'm taking care of ME now! The people who are close to me will see that I'm doing well with it. I would make the same recommendation as I did earlier with my partner.
Eva: I'd recommend it. Knowing that there is very likely to be a headwind. I'm a big fan of always including the emotional world - and then allowing this strange feeling for a moment that someone opposite you doesn't agree.
Just take a deep breath - you know it's coming - and simply say nothing and accept that someone is trying to rebel against something new. You can respond with a short statement like 'I'm currently changing my diet and I'd like to stay true to myself. That's why I don't eat pizza. I know you know me differently, but now it's time for something new'.
That your counterpart feels seen and that's all I would say.
I once had a customer who lost a lot of weight and fell back into the old pattern because he was the only one in his family, friends and work circle who ate healthily. This caused him so much trouble that he eventually gave in.
I think there are many people in this situation who would like their environment to support them. It's important that the momentum and motivation is so high that you follow through and remain patient and don't think 'Oh, poor me, I have to eat vegetables while everyone is eating pizza'. But rather 'I can do something good for myself. What the others do is none of my business'.
Eva: Yes, that's true. But I think it's a big challenge to go your own way in such a very different environment. I think that's very challenging.
I advised him at the time (unfortunately I didn't have the online course yet) that he should get to know at least one new person in his environment who also ticks in this direction. You should perhaps spend time in places where there is a good chance that there will be other people there who are interested in the topic.
Eva: That's why I think it's so good that you combine this with the lifestyle. In this example in particular, it's very clear that, in addition to diet, a change in lifestyle would also have been very beneficial.
Of course, you can't do anything about work colleagues and you have friends. But I think you can be open to meeting 2-3 new friends, or taking a course or going to a seminar.
Eva: Now I'm coming back to the table with my direct messages. I've found that it raises new questions about the relationships you have. I would actually question them for a while if I changed my lifestyle and my diet. If I go into health and awareness, it might be painful, but sometimes some friendships and acquaintances no longer fit.
What changing your diet has to do with self-love
That's true and I think that's another good point about being really vigilant and honest with yourself.
Eva: I think changing your diet or having made the decision to really do something in this direction is a big step towards being honest with yourself.
And towards self-love. I always say 'The gut is symbolic of our center and our roots and how we stand with our feet on the ground'. Basic trust has something to do with the gut and that's why it actually has very big connections.
I think you've given some great tips! I think what I'll definitely take away from our conversation is that the The importance of looking at things that may come up - and especially when you change your diet, detox, get rid of things, true essences sometimes emerge.
And that you are vigilant, mindful and face these processes and have the courage to say 'Oh, things are coming up that I didn't really want to look at, but if they're already there, I'll look at them too!
Eva: And while you're on the subject of toxins and detoxification. There are also toxic relationships. It doesn't always have to be an entire relationship, but there are toxic behaviors in relationships. You can change them, but they also come up. Like you described earlier with the man who sits next to you with an ice cream. There's something toxic in there and that also comes to the table. But you can also look at this and change it in the same way as your diet.
Experience more honesty and knowledge about your relationship in Eva's collaboration
And I've always said: 'Nutrition coaching is actually life coaching'. It may start with nutrition, but for me it's actually a gateway to a new life.
Dear Eva, I could go on forever, but I would love to hear something else from you.
If anyone would like more honesty and more knowledge about their relationships - do you have an offer? Would you like to say something about that?
Eva: I am one of a few 1:1 coaches. I don't have an online program, I don't do group programs. I've stayed true to 1:1 coaching and I'm still very passionate about it. I help people create new relationships and new careers and my focus is on leaving the 'old' behind.
There always needs to be a regenerative space. People come out of something that was very stressful, have stayed in something for a very long time that they no longer want to stay in.
Most people who come to me are like that and I simply want to focus on these regenerative processes.
That has a lot to do with connecting and dealing with your emotional world and then moving into the new in a stronger way. I do this much more slowly and with a lot of space and attention. My coaching sessions are always 2 or 3-month programs that start with a personal retreat day with me - that will soon be in the Allgäu, I'm moving there now.
These programs always start with this personal day. If that's not suitable, you can also do it online. Then there is a 2-month follow-up program, which can also be done online. I take a lot of space and time for my clients so that they can digest these processes, regenerate and then move step by step into the new.
This is what I offer in terms of relationships and career. I do initial consultations and then I very often focus on what my client needs. I put together individual programs. If you would like to try out my work - I have my free half-hour online self-love sessions this week and next week, where there are still a few calls available. Anyone who would like to try it out can send me a PN via Facebook, or an email at: info@evalueg.de
May they refer to having listened to the podcast and would love to would like to try out?
Eva: Yes, exactly.
This retreat day, are you alone with yourself? Or how should we imagine it?
Eva: You're alone with me and there are lots of tasks, but also lots of space and time to process them. I come from a bodywork background, so I have the opportunity to use bodywork and a day like this ends (for those who want to) with bodywork that digests everything.
This digestion - while we're on the subject of the gut - is very important to me because I think it's important to implement mindset processes in the body and let them sink in. Not always just tasks and learning and implementing, but also integrating the passive part.
Why a change in diet can be life-changing
...And our body reflects and signals a lot to us.
Eva: Exactly and also brings us a new clarity! I'm sure you know that too. When the gut becomes healthier, it brings new clarity to the surface.
Totally! Customers have already told me that it has changed their lives. It's amazing what a small and simple change in diet can do to get things flowing where someone may have suffered for years.
My passion is to empower people to take control of their lives and make their dreams come true.
I think it's great that everyone in this field complements each other so well and that issues can be approached from different angles, but always have the same end goal in the end. It's nice to see that one thing can lead to another.
That a change in diet can lead to whether I'm still happy in my partnership or things like that.
Eva: Exactly, or a break-up from a partnership can lead to: 'Oh, how unhealthy have I actually been living? As a new start, so to speak.
Eva's closing words: "Have more courage to communicate imperfectly!
"Is there anything else you would like to say to my listeners at the end?
Eva: I would pick out one aspect that I have said before.
First of all, it is often enough to have a bad feeling to say 'I don't want that'. We don't always have to explain everything.
It's enough to have a bad feeling and to express it and, in the process, to calmly express immature states. 'I don't know why yet, but it doesn't feel right.' 'I'm not happy with it, I'd like it to be different.'
Saying it like this helps enormously, also for your partner.
Having more courage to allow, express and communicate these immature states much more imperfectly.
Thank you very much!
These are the links to the episode:
Eva offers free self-love online sessions (30 minutes)for Darmglückpodcast listeners, you can contact her via Facebook or email if you would like to take advantage of this.
Eva Lueg's website is: https://evalueg.de/
Now I encourage you to subscribe to the podcast so you don't miss an episode, and if you like what you hear, I really appreciate a review on iTunes or Apple Podcast. Because those reviews also help other people find the podcast so we can spread the knowledge about gut and health more.
